“I would have just told them to fuck off!”
I smiled as I looked my young friend in the eye- one I would soon have to let go- and said, calmly and without apology:
“How you finish is just as important as how you start.”
And I meant it.
Do I find it ironic that I was living out those exact words only months later?
Not at all.
Welcome to my life, a never-ending series of moments that demand I become the person I say I want to be.
Don’t preach what you are not willing to live out.
I have worked in the hospitality industry for over 25 years, and I have never had a manager like Joni Woods. She sees what is human in each of her employees, and honors their individuality on a daily basis. She is strongly invested in the positive culture of the workplace. She does not involve herself in petty drama or the intimidation tactics that are sometimes employed by middle managers. Joni also understands that life can bleed into the workplace, and helps employees make reasonable accommodations. I would strongly recommend Joni to implement and support a values-based and productive workplace.
Sincerely,
Server
As I navigate another- yet not unfamiliar- transition in my life, I notice something new.
Where fear once lived, there is now peace.
And underneath that peace? Strength.
If that makes sense.
I feel stronger in my beliefs. Stronger in my values. Stronger in my passion for people- for building relationships rooted in psychological safety and trust. Stronger in my conviction that when you invest in who your employee is, not just what they produce, everything changes.
Now more than ever, we must create safe spaces for our teams.
We must see them fully- in their joy, their fear, their brilliance, and their fragility.
For me, hospitality has never been just about what we give our guests.
It is about how we treat one another.
It is how we build healthy relationships.
It is how culture is formed- one interaction at a time.
I am writing this regarding Joni Woods, with whom I had the pleasure of working with. As I was in a kitchen position and Joni was a Front of House Manager, we had little initial overlap, however I soon came to realize that she has a real knack for cultivating workplace relationships. This positive culture shift following Joni’s arrival had an immense impact in the overall flow of information through the staff. Having a manager who both paid constant attention to the tone of the overall workplace and took it upon themselves to get ahead of potential interpersonal issues was certainly an eye opening experience, and the resulting reduction in overall “grumpiness” was replaced often with the infectious positivity that Joni herself embodied. Despite the lighthearted demeanor, Joni was excellent in a pinch, and could always be counted on to de-escalate high stress situations, and handled with an empathetic firmness the hard conversations that come with the position.
Overall, Joni has been a joy to work with, and very much a material asset to the culture of the restaurant.
With regards,
Prep Chef
Tonight, I am enjoying a beautiful view from my bedroom window.
The Snow Moon is full- the last full moon of the Snake year. There is a quiet poetry in the timing: my final day of work arriving during a moment that asks me to release what no longer serves me.
For much of this year, I felt like I was riding three different horses with one ass.
And let’s be honest- no one can do that.
So I am breathing. Really breathing.
And I am grateful for the pause.
This next month feels like a blessing.
A time to drive my daughter to school every morning.
A time when my son no longer has to step into roles he was never meant to carry.
It’s a season to pour fully into the book, to record the audio, to create its accompanying guide, to honor the vision I’ve held for so long.
A season to be held by the people who love me.
Including a soul who truly treasures me.
And more than anything, it is a chance to spread wings forged through fire- wings that carried me through and will now carry me forward.
Throughout my time in knowing Joni for over a year, she has continually shown her great character and leadership. Joni shows every day that she is not above her employees by being active on the floor, assisting with anything that needs to be done, from clearing and resetting tables, taking orders for busy servers, to making tea for a guest. She is skilled in dealing with difficult guests and situations no matter how tense they might be. She’s never wavered, even when personally attacked verbally, she shows great composure. Joni shows up every day mentally, always bringing positivity and joy into the workplace with the intent to spread it to everyone around her. She is full of wisdom she imparts on those willing to listen, having had a great impact on myself in the workplace and in my life.
In my 12 years in the food service industry, I have met exactly two others, out of dozens of managers, that care and show up the way Joni does every single day. She’s hard working and passionate about everything she does and it rubs off on her staff. She always has our back, no matter what the circumstance. She is kind and helpful in a way few people can be in the situations she’s put in. People like her do not come around often. It has been a pleasure working under her and any establishment would be lucky and blessed to have someone like Joni in their ranks.
Bartender
As these recommendations make their way back to me, I am overwhelmed with gratitude.
Grateful for every person on my team.
Grateful for every moment I was allowed to love on them.
Have I mentioned how deeply I want to love the people in my life?
Over the past three weeks, as I committed to finishing strong, the transition was emotionally painful and mentally exhausting. And yet- every hug, every kind word, every shared tear filled me up in ways that only reaffirm why I do this work.
Why I always will.
Today, my son- lighthearted as ever- asked me what it feels like to be unemployed.
He, more than anyone, has witnessed what it means for me to live my values.
He still works for the employer who fired me a year and a half ago. When it happened, he wanted to quit “in my defense.” I told him no.
Even then- and especially then- we would be a family that walks in integrity and character.
I am proud of him.
And while he may question my reasoning now, I know he has learned to trust this mother of his, one who is determined to live what she believes.
Because in the end, how you finish really does matter.
With all of my love,
XOXO j
Journey Coaching 
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